Positively Optimistic Day #40- Take Me, Or Leave Me

“The difference between my darkness and your darkness is that I can look at my own badness in the face and accept its existence while you are busy covering your mirror with a white linen sheet.”

– C. JoyBell C.

I wanted to share with you all two things that happened to me at work today. Both happened after I got done talking with amazingly, sweet guests.

1. I was left this note by a lady

2. Two ladies left me a tip of 40 dollars and I wasn’t even their server.

I’m not sharing this to brag. I’m sharing to this in an effort to explain why these wonderful things happened to me.

The reason these things happened to me is because of something I love very much about myself and that is that I’m a genuine person. I don’t try to act like something I’m not.

Why is this important? It’s important because many people are not like this anymore. For example at our jobs many people act like the sweetest person on the planet to the customers when they really don’t care. What people don’t realize is that other people can smell that crap from miles away. It’s pretty easy to spot someone who’s genuine and someone who is not.

I don’t care where I am I will always be genuine. If I smile at someone it’s because I wanted to. If I give you a compliment it’s because I mean it. It’s strange but the ladies who tipped me 40 dollars I just passed by their table and complimented the one ladies hair accessory. I then stopped by another time to see if they needed anything while their waitress was busy. I could have easily avoided them because after all it wasn’t my table but I wanted to be nice to them because that’s me. And I know the ladies recognized this too.

When you do things out of being genuine instead of for money or whatever purpose then you will find the world around you open up. I can honestly say that none of my friends from the past and to the present can say I was never there for them. Because that’s part of me and how I am.

If someone needs me I’ll be there for them the best that I can. They never have to question that. And sometimes I think that’s why it hurts when people just drop me.

A few months ago in particular two friends that I had unfriended me on Facebook without saying why they were mad at me. Mind you these were people I thought would be friends for life. I can admit I could have sometimes been a better friend. And while we all were friends I was still extremely depressed (which I didn’t think they could handle). However I never tried to put anything on them.

I learned after they unfriended me though that they weren’t genuine friends. They just “acted” nice in front of my face and when they found a chance to cut me all off they did. Yet I

would walked mountains for them.

If they unfriended me because of my negativity I can respect that. If someone makes you feel toxic then by all means cut them off or limit your interaction if you can. (I’ve had to limit time I spend with negative people too.. so don’t feel bad about that if you have to). Because at the end of the day you need to be able to take care of you without feeling like someone is draining all the life out of you.

What bothers me though is not that they wanted me cut out of their lives..it’s that they weren’t genuine. Through the whole time we were all friends I was always genuine with them. I was always me. Which sometimes wasn’t always the pretty side of myself. But if I acted happy all the time that just wouldn’t have been genuine at all. And I would never want my friends to have to fake how they feel.

I may have never been a perfect friend, but I can 100% say that I never put on a front. However they would act like they care one day. Then through other friends I would hear they had said horrible things about me.

I was really hurt when they unfriended me because I felt like they were really my only two good friends down here. Yet I realized after time passed they were really toxic to me too. I can remember many times where I’d be happy and they would say something that brought me down.

Now that I’ve had time to think about it it’s no wonder I was depressed being around them haha. I honestly can’t tell you how much happier

I’ve been since they’ve been cut out. Which might sound mean but just go with me..

I can tell you honestly I hope the same goes for them. I hope they are both having incredibly happy lives without me. In fact I did text

one of them after it happened that I didn’t understand why they unfriended me and that I was sorry for whatever I did. But that I still cared about them and I wished them the both the best/ happiest lives.

I went on a long rampage with that example, but my point out of that is that I was still genuine with them. I could have just simply said those things without meaning them. And maybe they didn’t think I meant them but all I know is that it was genuine and that’s all that matters. Yes, I did feel mad too but I also cared about them enough to just want them to be happy even if that meant without me.

That’s because that’s who I am. I have a caring heart and even my haters know this about me. Why did I say haters?! Bah..hahaha. Besides the point that’s me whether I’m with a friend or at work. Yes, I may show different sides of myself, different places but you best believe it’s always me, Amber.

This may make me lose people in my life but it also helps me gain others. This may be just my opinion but I much rather have people in my life who except me for my imperfections and strengths. Not just for a fake persona I put on.

I also know when I’m genuine with everyone that when people still care about me when I show them who I genuinely am, that they are also true, genuine friends; which is amazing. Because I will tell you now some of the friends I have made I barely talk to anymore because we are all busy with life/ live many different places but best believe we all know we have each other’s backs even if we live in a different place or how many years go by. This is because genuine friends love is unconditional a lot like a mothers.

I just wanted to share with you all this because I just want to inspire you all to just be genuine too. If you’re happy be happy. If you’re mad be mad. If you’re sad about something, let yourself be sad. Don’t be fake. We have enough of that in our world today.

In a world full of teeth..be a toothpick. Oh my goodness that was a horrible example but it made me laugh so oh well. You get the point anyways. Just don’t act a certain way because of other people. Like I said earlier they can smell that from miles away anyway. So if that’s the case..why not be genuine? And for the most part in the end you get more rewarded for it anyway.

Be genuine because we need more people like that in the world. People who actually mean things instead of just acting like they do. Be a genuine you, you rockstar! Much love to you all.

Talk again tomorrow,

Amber ❤️❤️❤️

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