A Lesson in Not Giving Up

Hi Dreamers,

One of my favorite memories as a kid is a funny story. When I was about 5 years old I was playing a board game with my family. Like most young kids (and adults) I hated to lose. I was a very competitive little girl. You can imagine how upset I was when I realized I was losing the game. I got up out of my seat with frustration and told my family that I quit.

My uncle who was visiting us at the time told me not to give up. After a whole lot of convincing he got me to not give up on myself. Even though I had for sure thought I had lost the whole game– I walked back to finish the game. To my surprise even though it looked like I wouldn’t be able to even manage to make it to second place it ended up that I won the game.

This story always puts a smile on my face when I think about it. It is one of my best memories I cherish because my uncle was there. He was one of my favorite people on the entire planet and he ended up passing away not many years after this memory had taken place. I also remember this memory because it taught me a very important lesson in life and that was to not give up even when things are not going your way and that’s what I wanted to talk about to you today.

There’s no ignoring it sometimes in life you can just feel defeated. Something happens and you fall flat down on your face. You just don’t feel like you can get back up again, but when you fall under this victim mentality you will never win in life. Everyone has bad things that happen to them but the difference between those who end up winning in life and those who don’t is if they choose to rise above their circumstances or that they choose to just sit there in self-pity.

The most successful people on the planet have failed many, MANY times. We see many people’s highlight reels without seeing all the struggle they actually went through to get to where they are today. These people may have felt like giving up on their dreams or themselves, but what made them successful is that they kept going anyway. Just because you may lose some battles doesn’t mean you will lose at life itself. Every setback or loss is stepping stone to lead you to where you are supposed to go. You will never know though if you just give up when you have these setbacks.

I know, personally, from my own life experience that the good parts of my life came after not giving up during the hard seasons. Those hard seasons helped me learn what not to do and helped me succeed later. Just like that story from when I was a little girl. If I gave up on things that mattered to me I would never have any wins in my life — just like I would have never won that game.

Dreamers, when you feel like you’re losing please remember to not give up, because like my silly story you will win. You just can’t give up. Keep on fighting and I promise you that one day you will win.

Thanks for listening,

Amber

Who Am I?

Hello there Beautiful Dreamers,

I hope you are all having a great day so far! This morning I’ve been just pondering about things and thought about the question “Who am I?”. It’s such a simple question to say yet it’s very powerful. As I asked myself this question I tried to think of a way to sum up who I am. When I thought deeper about the question; however, I couldn’t determine just one way or word to describe myself. That’s because I am many things just like you are.

You may be a daughter, a sister, a brother, an artist, a doctor, a caregiver, etc. Those are things that you could be, but they are just one way aspect of who you really are. For example, I am a daughter, a sister, a girlfriend, an artist, a compassionate soul, a writer, hard- worker, goal achiever, a friend etc. But I am not just one of those things. I am several different things rolled up into one. Each one of those things tells a part of who I am, but not one of those aspects overall sums up everything that I am. These are all qualities that I have that when put all together help tell the story of who I am.

The powerful idea to also take away from this is we are all changing every single day so what might be a part of who you are right now may not be a part of who you are in the future. Also some parts may always be a part of your story but at different times of your life certain parts will play a more important part of telling who you are more than others. Who we are is not some set in stone answer. Who we are is who we decide to be in each present moment.

A strong example of this is our mistakes. We all make mistakes, but it’s our choice every single day whether we let those mistakes help define who we are. In certain stages of life you may think you are your mistakes, but in another stage you may see your mistakes as the fall you needed in order to become a better you.

My challenge for you today dreamers is to think about the factors in your life that make you who you are. Make a list and then look at that list and decide if that’s who you want to be in this very moment. If a yes, keep rocking what is true to you; however, if you don’t like all that’s on your list this is your opportunity right now to decide what you want to remove/ add to your list.

Have an Amazing Day Dreamers,

Amber

A Reminder of Your Inner Strength

Hi Beautiful Dreamers,

Lately I’ve been dealing with something that has been draining me. I keep hearing this voice in the back of my head saying “You cannot handle this. You are not strong enough.” For the last couple of days to be honest I haven’t felt very strong. Then a different voice inside of me raised it’s voice.

“Amber..do you not know who you are? Look at all you’ve overcome in your life. You’ve battled so many challenging obstacles in your life and you’ve always managed to get back up every single time. No matter what life threw at you. You thought you couldn’t pull through but you did. You did.”

Somehow that inner voice that spoke to me out of nowhere was that exact voice I needed to hear. I wanted to write about this in today’s post because one of you out there may be feeling like you can’t take any more or that you are not strong enough to handle something. I want to remind you like that little voice reminded me that YOU ARE STRONG ENOUGH. Just because you feel like you will not make it through this circumstance doesn’t mean that you won’t.

You can and guess what? You will. You can get through anything this world will hand to you because you are you. You are equipped with whatever you need to make it through any situation. You a strong, you are brave, you are wonderful, and you can do anything. Believe this. Know this. Own this.

You got this dreamers,

Amber

5 Effective Ways to Cut Back Your Time on Social Media

A Generation Raised on Social Media

I was in middle school when my obsession for social media started. I remember it like yesterday sitting in my local library logging into my Facebook account and trying not to get kicked off by the librarian who said I had to be 18 to access the site. It was this whole new world that I quickly became immersed with. As an awkward, anti-social, unpopular middle schooler I found that I could be/ or say whatever I wanted when I was on Facebook.

It felt like I was free; however, my 13 year old self did not realize that it was actually doing the opposite. Soon like many other people in my generation I got addicted to it. It was something about that high feeling everytime I went to check it and I had a notification. Would it be my crush that would message me or like my pictures? No. But did that stop me from thinking it would happen? Also No.

1.) Set a Timer on Your Phone

Photo by Mike on Pexels.com

Did you know that you are able to go into your phone and set time limits? Well if you didn’t know now you do. If you have Iphone you can just go into your settings and go to App Limits and pick your desired time you would like to spend on an app per day that way you do not go over. When 3 minutes of going through news feed turns into 3 hours. This is how you can help avoid that.

2.) Find Other Ways to Spend that Time

Photo by javier gonzalez on Pexels.com

This is one of my favorite tips that has probably helped me the most. This is replacing that habit with a new, healthier one. For example, with the time I don’t waste scrolling through social media I could write a blog, draw a picture, practice my photography, or develop a new skill. You can replace it with something you also enjoy but also benefits your life.

3.) Think of Deleting it Off Entirely

Photo by Boys in Bristol Photography on Pexels.com

This can sound like tough love, because honestly it is tough love. Sometimes it’s just better to delete it altogether for a while so you don’t have that temptation. Yes, you could technically log in with a computer still; however, that takes more effort than a simple tap of your finger on your phone screen. I can’t tell you how much my mood shifted when I either deleted a social media app off my phone or deactivated my account for a little while. It helped me realize that have such a habit of checking it when I am bored and that I could rather use that time to do something way more productive.

4.) Put the Phone as Far Away from You as Possible

Photo by Athena on Pexels.com

One of the most simplest yet effective ways to limit the amount of time you waste on social media is to make it less accessible. A good way to do this is when you are, for example, working on a homework assignment move your phone to the opposite side of your room that way it’s harder to have access to your phone. You could get up and walk over and check it, but that would mean it would require more effort and if you are anything like me you’ll think about it for a second but then realize it’s not worth walking across the room for.

5.) The Swear Jar Method

Photo by Miguel u00c1. Padriu00f1u00e1n on Pexels.com

This is exactly what you are thinking it is. Instead of every time you swear you put a dime in the jar it’s every time you check social media. You can owe yourself this money or make it even challenging and give a friend money every time you look at it. You will start losing the temptation as much when you know you have to pay money for using it. If you do look at it you have to then decide that it’s worth your money.

Thank you all for reading this post! If you would like to know more ways of cutting back on social media let me know and I’ll make another blog post. Have a great day,

Amber

Do You Know Who You Are?

Hey Beautiful Dreamers,

This morning I woke up and was scrolling through social media and then started feeling insecure with myself comparing myself to others. I then had a thought that really stuck with me and that was “Why are you comparing yourself to others? Don’t you know who you are? You are the sh!t.”

I feel like most of us (especially woman) can relate to this in some shape or form. With the average person spending most of their day on social media I think it’s almost impossible to not have felt that at some point. You are looking at these people you feel are prettier than you are or more successful. You then take a look at your own life and feel like complete garbage.

I want to ask you all the same question I asked myself this morning “Do you know who you are?” I don’t know you, but I’m completely sure that you are a lot more then you give yourself credit for. You are so focused on other people that you forget all that you’ve accomplished and how uniquely beautiful you are in your own way. We were all not born to be a clone of everyone else. We were born to be ourselves. We are all giving a special opportunity to stand out in our own way.

If no one has told you today you are beautiful, awesome, and are doing a great job. You are rare jewel in this world so it’s time that you start realizing that. DO NOT be any means undervalue yourself. No one is better than you. I don’t care if they are a famous movie star or own several cars or have the ‘perfect’ body. You are just as good as anyone out there.

Instead of feeling envious of other people be happy for them. And go do whatever makes you feel beautiful and happy. Our time is so valuable and it’s such a waste if we use it being jealous and putting down other people in order for us to feel better about ourselves. Instead send love energy to others in the world and expect love energy sent back to you. We all deserve that!

The next time you start comparing yourselves to others and feel bad about yourself I challenge you to remind yourself you are the shit and that you are valuable beyond belief.

As always thank for reading dreamers,

Much love Amber

Setting a Target

Hey Dreamers,

Today I want to talk about setting a target, and no I did not say ‘shopping at Target.’ Shout out to everyone who loves shopping at Target (like yours truly) though — you all are the real MVPs. The target I am referring to though is the one of what you want to accomplish in your life.

Now you may be thinking “Well duh, I already know what I want in life.” I want to challenge that idea though. Are you really setting a specific thing in life you want to accomplish and working towards that or are you more like what I’ve done in my life and throwing arrows at multiple targets? I love that I have multiple interests in life. I feel like that keeps my life interesting and helps me grow; however, when I have too many interests that can also be a distraction. What I mean by that is sometimes I’ll invest energy here or there with various that I don’t sit down and think which future goal of mine I really want to invest the most energy in.

An example of this for me is that one of the things I really want to accomplish in my life is to write books. It’s a wonderful goal/ dream; however, in the current moment I haven’t done anything to move me towards doing that. In the back of my mind I have this clear idea of things I want to do, but the problem is I’ll be like “I’ll do that one day” or I’ll take the steps towards it for a few moments “when I feel like it” instead of deciding that right now I am going to decide that I am going to do it and set steps of how I can get there and decide how long I approximately I want to take to accomplish this goal.

In one of my favorite podcasts the host says this quote that really stuck with me and that is “where focus goes, energy flows.” That quote is true in any area of life, but especially when it comes to making our dreams come true. If our focus is all over the place then the energy is not going to go to what is most important to you it’s going to be scattered all over the place with no clear direction.

This is why it’s so important to decide what really is the most important things in your life and once you decide that you can decide you will focus more on that and prioritize it over other things going on in your life. For example, for me instead of watching television for a few hours a day I could spend one of those hours working on a chapter of a book instead. If I don’t give myself that clear direction though I will just continue watching Hulu for a few hours instead of moving towards a goal that is really important to me.

It’s simply deciding what you want, writing down the steps you can take to accomplish it, and then taking action. This is all easier said then down, but I promise you once you focus in on that target your trying to hit you will see change in your life and be way more likely to accomplish anything you want in life.

My challenge for you all today Dreamers is to write down a few important goals that mean the most to you and then write down the steps you can take each day that will put you a little closer each and every day of reaching those goals.

Like always Dreamers thank you for listening and go set that target,

Amber

Being Happy in the Now

Hey Beautiful Dreamers,

Lately I have really been trying to plan for my future. Trying to go after a future I will be proud of. I love being able to set goals and accomplish them; however, that being said sometimes when I think too far in the future I forget to enjoy the here and now. I think many of us can be like that where we keep dreaming of creating a bigger and better life for ourselves. I think that is a fantastic then to do, but I also think while we are on the journey to reach those goals that we should enjoy the process.

I realized recently I haven’t really been doing this. Sometimes I think of all I haven’t accomplished and how better I wish my life was that I truly don’t appreciate everything that I am currently blessed with which is a lot even though I don’t see that sometimes. The fact that I’m healthy and can sit here typing this blog post is something to be grateful for. All around us are little blessings; however, we usually go throughout our day taking all these things for granted.

Sometimes I’ll be in my car and just have to remind myself to be grateful for my car being functional. As I’ve had cars go out on me multiple times and have no air conditioning in them, but this car hasn’t given me many issues and has functional ac (which in Florida is a life saver). I can also do cool things like link up my music from my phone to play by bluetooth in the car. Which was like the greatest thing in my life when I bought my car. That being said sometimes I don’t tend to think how blessed I am to have it, and now I try to really take time to think about how grateful I am for it.

I’m sure many of us can find similar examples in our day to day lives of things we take for granted. Whether it be things, relationships with people, or our health. There is so much that we can be happy about in the here and now. If we don’t practice gratitude in our everyday lives do we really think we’ll be happy when we accomplish the goals we have for ourselves? We might temporary be happy, but it is not going to stay permanent. Our brains will constantly tell ourselves this story of ‘I’ll be happy when I get this’ and then when you get that and are not happy we convince ourselves that something new will make us happy. We will keep going through this vicious cycle until we can learn to appreciate what we have in this moment. Right here and right now.

If you have running water..be grateful. If you have a bed to sleep tonight..be grateful. Many others do not and yet we think our lives suck because we don’t live in that mansion and don’t have the newest Iphone. If you want those kind of things that is great, but what I’m trying to say is don’t let those things define your happiness. We find happiness when we stop for a minute and reflect the little things in our everyday life. Like a sunny day or being loved unconditionally by your pet. There is something to be happy about for you today. You just got to look up and find it.

Thanks for listening dreamers until next blog post,

Amber

Your Time is Valuable

Hey there Beautiful Dreamers,

Time. Such a simple word, but what a significant meaning. As a child it sometimes feels like time takes forever. You keep checking the clock and you swear that it was the exact same time 15 minutes ago. Then you grow up and it’s like time took many shots of expresso and is now going at an extremely fast pace.

As I keep aging the more I come to realize how valuable our time really is. This is why now I have come to a point in my life where I want to spend my time doing the things I love and spending it with the people who truly care about me. Life is too short in my opinion not to.

I find myself a lot lately trying to think about where I spend my time. Maybe it’s due to the fact that I just turned 27 and it’s hitting me that my 30s are right around the corner. Not that you are that old in your 30s, but for me it’s been a real awakening to see how fast almost 30 years has gone by. In a way this has been a motivator to me to get stuff done that I was before putting off because I told myself I could just do it later.

I am proud that I’m really focusing on the things I want to accomplish in life. I have been working on this blog, for example, more often. I have also been really practicing my art and photography too. All these things I have done on and off during my life, but at some point they would fall on the back burner and I’d just tell myself that I would do it later when I had more of my life together. It then hit me like a ton of breaks..I’ve been waiting for this perfect moment for everything to happen in my life that I avoid actually doing what I need to do to get the ball rolling.

I think most of us can relate to this to some extent. We procrastinate and wait for this what we think is the “right moment” that really doesn’t exist. After listening to podcasts and interviews with the most successful people most of them say there was never a perfect moment to begin, and most of them admit they may have even stunk at whatever they did at first, but guess what they got successful by putting the time and practice in it.

I think many of us have this illusion with social media as well. We think we’ll be famous by posting this one video and going viral. With modern technology we are used to getting what we want in an instant. I say this as I have been always a huge fan of technology; however, I think that since my generation and generations after have been raised with having many things just given to them that we develop this lazy mentality in a way that the older generations didn’t have. A good example of this is when people used to write research papers for school they used to have to go to the library and go through many books to find what they were looking for; however, now we have all this information by going to Google and not even having to leave our home. The older generations had to usually develop a hard work ethic when my generation for example didn’t have to work as hard to get some things. I am in no way saying my generation is lazy (I know the most amazing people with great work ethic that are my age) what I am saying though is that we weren’t taught always at a young age that we had to work hard for what we wanted. I can honestly say that during my childhood I would think all this success would be just handed to me.

Now as an adult I can see how silly that seems. Like of course you have to put in the work to make something happen. Back then I really didn’t understand the work I needed to put in and just how valuable my time was. I’m grateful that I’ve learned about work ethic and time management as I have gotten older. That being said I am not perfect at it and still need to work on it. I am so much better than I used to be though.

I have also noticed the value of my time when it comes to my relationships. I am now very picky about who I spend my time with. Now I only have room for people who are my real friends/family and treat me with the same respect I treat them with. I also try to now meet people who I also think will bring value to my life as I hope to bring value to them as well.

For much of my life I spent it trying to be there for people who weren’t there for me, or influenced my life in a negative manner. To be honest it’s really in this last year that I’ve realized that I don’t want to spend the precious time I have left here on this Earth trying to get people to see my worth or trying to drag them out of a dark place while I let them drag me into that. I realized I want to fill my life with people and experiences that add to my life, and I encourage you dreamers to do the same. Realize you deserve to have people in your life that really care about you and have experiences in your life to make your dreams come true.

Make the most out of your valuable time! You deserve the best. You may have to put in hard work and have to let go of some relationships in your life, but it will be worth it in the end. It will be worth it because that time spent will move you closer to the life you want to have.

Have a beautiful night dreamers,

Your friend Amber

You Are What You Believe

Hey you Beautiful Dreamers you,

I’m excited to share a topic with you that has changed my life around for the better and honestly keeps changing it for the better the more I practice it. The concept is who you are is a reflection of how you feel about and see yourself.

For a good portion of my childhood and pretty much until high school I had such a low perspective of myself. I saw myself as a useless nobody, who no one liked, and got outcasted. As you can guess this way I saw myself effected my who life. I was young and didn’t realize at the time that the way I viewed myself was a huge factor on how others viewed me.

I really developed a victim approach to my life. It wasn’t until some people noticed it that I started to realize that I could control how I viewed myself. Fast forward..I began to learn about the law of attraction. If you don’t know what law of attraction is it’s basically that like attracts like. That the things in your life that you focus on and think about over time create your reality.

When I began to learn about this idea it gradually began to change my life. When I started to challenge the ideas I had about myself I saw massive change in my life. I remember I really put this idea into motion in my early 20s when I made my first dreamboard. I’ve mentioned it before in another blog post and the reason I mention it so much is because it’s when I started seeing my life transform.

The reason why I think this had such a significant impact in my life is because it had me challenge how I saw myself. I started associating with that new identity that I created on my vision board instead of the old identity I had for myself. I would do things that my new identity would do like work out for example. When I started changing my old habits to new habits that I wanted my new identity to have I saw massive change in my life.

My advice to anyone wanting to make a change in their life is to see yourself with that change and take little steps at a time that, that person would do. For example, if you wanted to be an artist. Ask yourself what an artist would do and how they would act. Then start coming up with things in your everyday life that would be like that ideal artist version of yourself. You could for example set an amount of time each day to sketch or look for other artists work to help inspire you. Small things that you can do over time that will eventually become a habit and help shift your identity.

Decide who you want to be, believe it and act accordingly to it. That’s really all you have to do. The ability to live the life you want and be the person you want to be lies within yourself.

Have a great night Dreamers & dream beautiful dreams,

Amber

I Just Called to Say ‘I Love You’

Hey Beautiful Dreamers,

I am going to be showing my age, but do you all recall the song “I Just Called to Say I Love You” by Stevie Wonder? That song is replaying in my head over and over as it goes right along with the topic I’m going to be talking about today.

A few days ago we lost a comedy legend Bob Saget. I was on break at work and when I scrolled through social media I saw that he had passed away. I was in complete shock and disbelief. Yes, I know I never knew the man personally, but hearing about his death really saddened me. Full House was one of my favorite shows as a kid. I loved the show so much that when I was in elementary school I would wake up at 4 a.m. before school started to watch Full House when the episodes came on at Nick at Night.

Like many people around the world I fell in love with the characters in Full House. I loved how they were an untypical kind of family; however, it somehow worked really well. The characters were all relatable in some way and the lessons they went through made you feel like you really bonded with them. Like in a way you were part of the family.

I remembered that feeling when I heard the news of Bob’s passing. Even though I did not know him his character in that show had such an influence on me as I’m sure it did for many people. As I was scrolling social media I read what all his close friends were saying about him. One thing that stuck with me the most is that all these people in some way, shape, or form all said along the same things such as he always told people that he loved them constantly and that he had a way of making everyone feel special.

This whole circumstance really made me ponder about how life is so freaking short and that we never know when our time is up. All we can do is to make the most out of the time that we have. I kept thinking about how even though his life ended shorter than we expected that he spent most of it making other people feel awesome. This really hit me hard as I turned 27 yesterday and I just keep thinking about how fast my life has gone already, and that with the rest of my time here I want to do what Bob did and make sure others know they are loved and how truly special they are.

Hopefully I do not die anytime soon (haha), but when that time eventually comes around I hope my life leaves others feeling like they were so special to me and that I somehow made a difference in their life. I want to spend the rest of my life telling others how much I love them and how much they mean to me. I want to live my life as fully as possible, and I want to inspire others to do the same.

Back to tie this all to the beginning of this post. When was the last time you just called someone to tell them you loved them dreamers? When was the last time you hugged someone? How have you made others in your life feel special? These are the questions I’ve been really asking myself here lately, and the truth be told I need to be doing better about it myself. I can do better, and from now on I am going to do better to do all those things.

So what are you waiting for dreamers? Go call/ message/ mail/ or go see someone and let them know that you love them.

Thanks for your time dreamers,

Amber