The Person Standing in Your Way

Hey Beautiful Dreamers,

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Photo by Leo Cardelli on Pexels.com

Yesterday a thought entered my mind that I want to talk to you all about today, and that thought is about what is standing in your way from living your dreams. For many years of my life I always felt like there was something that was stopping me from living the life I wanted to live. I could make up any excuse you could think of. I would come up with excuses such as it’s not the right time, I’ll do it tomorrow, I don’t have the right equipment to start, I’m depressed, my past, other people etc. I could keep going on all day if I wanted to. I was literally the excuse queen.

It wasn’t until I took a step back and looked at my life that I realized it wasn’t any of these things I came up with that were standing in my way. It wasn’t an excuse, but instead a person that was standing in my way. You can imagine the shock when I realized that person was me. The day that my mind connected with that concept it changed me. When I finally came to this conclusion I realized that I had spent a good majority of my life blaming everything else under the sun except the person to actually blame — me.

I awakened to the idea that I spent an incredible amount of time/ energy trying to come up with excuses to not make my life better that with that same energy I could have instead used towards bettering my life. I think many of us are like this in a way. We stand in our own way of what we want without realizing it. We let what we tell ourselves to get in our own way.

What I have learned is that the people that succeed in this life are the people who stop getting in their own way and just go do what they want. They still deal with the same aspects that we all do such as: fear, not feeling like enough, hardships, and just not feeling the motivation; however, they make themselves do it anyway. That is the key. You need to move past all the excuses that your mind is coming up with and just go for it.

If you are struggling with this problem right now I want you to know that you are worth that incredible life that you desire. You are worth more than you could ever know. You just need to do yourself a favor and let go of all the things that you keep telling yourself that are keeping you trapped in this vicious cycle. You deserve your dream life, and you have in you right now what you need to accomplish it. Those dreams that live inside of you were given to you for a reason, and it is now your responsibility to move past yourself to make it a reality.

Thanks for reading dreamers until next time,

Amber

Imperfectly Perfect

Hey Beautiful Dreamers, 

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When I was 180 lbs

Today I want to talk about a topic that’s been an ongoing learning process for me, and that is embracing my imperfections. Like many woman in particular I have struggled feeling confident about my weight and how I presented myself to the world. For those of you who don’t know I had a drastic weight loss of 60 lbs. After years of battling either being where I was obese, or at some points stick thin I was finally able to find balance.

It wasn’t until really these last 2 years that I’ve felt like I’ve been at a healthy weight for me. I had lost all of this weight yet I still carried all the weight of the damage done to my self esteem over the years. I did not look the same, but inside I still felt like the little girl who was getting made fun of at school. People cannot understand how this kind of battle can effect someone mentally unless they have been through it. You go from one day being called fat/ ugly by a guy you had a crush on to a guy actually looking at you because he thinks you’re cute (not that you have something on your face- although let’s be honest that probably still happens – haha). In a way this made me feel good, because I felt like I was finally being noticed. On the other hand, what it also did was re- enforce my belief that people only cared about what I looked like which caused more damage.

I used to be under the impression that somehow when I got my body to a great size that I would become happy, but I very wrong. Now don’t get me wrong I am extremely happy that I lost the weight and I am very much so a happier person than I was before; however, losing the weight did not magically make all of my insecurities go away. I just found new ones to replace them. Like my lose skin, or the fact that I have cellulite, my hair, or how my nose is shaped. No matter what I would find something. I was always going to find something about me that I didn’t like and that I deemed ‘imperfect.’

One day I had a friend complaining about her weight and saying she would have better luck with guys if she were skinny. She kept going on telling me that she would be happy if she could lose the weight like me. I told her something that day I wish someone had told me long ago and that was “You need to be happy with who you are right now, because who you are right now is good enough. If you really do want to lose weight do it for yourself and not for others approval.”

Isn’t it odd how we can give others great advice, but we can’t tell ourselves the same exact thing? I told her that advice, because I could see the beauty that was within her even with her weight. I could not see that same beauty within myself though. I kept trying to ‘fix’ myself by staying a certain weight, caking myself with a bunch of makeup, and getting blonde highlights that blinded you.

I kept changing myself to find validation through others so even if it was for just a moment I could feel beautiful. It became an unhealthy addiction to where I needed to look ‘perfect’. It got so bad that if no one complimented me I felt like it was because I looked ugly and that I needed to look for a new way to improve. One day a guy approached me telling me I looked exactly like a Barbie doll (the image I always wanted to look like), and hearing those words didn’t make me feel like I thought I would feel. I still felt like I wasn’t enough. That day started to change me in a way. I started to realize that I was never going to live up to my impossible standards.

Since that day I have been trying to make an effort to embrace more of my imperfections. Our ‘so – called’ imperfections are what makes us stand out and unique. If we all erased our imperfections we wouldn’t be us. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve looked at another human being and admired something unique about their features that they could be insecure about. I think many of us are that same way. We can find beauty in others imperfections, but we think that ours make us not enough somehow. We need to stop viewing ourselves with such criticism and view ourselves like a fabulous piece of artwork.

I was talking with a very dear friend of mine today, and she was saying how we had to learn to love ourselves from that outside perspective. That we had to learn to love that little kid that lives within us all. The kid in us just wants to be told that they are enough just as they are. That kid that lives within needs to hear that they don’t have to be what society tells them to be. The kid needs to know that they don’t have to look or act a certain way – that just being who they are is enough and if someone cannot appreciate that then they lost someone incredibly valuable.

Dreamers, I want you to ask yourselves what you tell your inner child. Are you mean to yourself or do you speak to yourself out of love? If you talk to yourself in the first way I want to challenge you (like I’m starting to challenge myself) to talk to yourself in a loving friend way. Tell yourself how valuable you are and how what others may have put you down for is truly what makes you beautiful. Don’t listen to the negative opinions of others. You get to be in charge of how you define your own self. We will never reach ‘perfect’, but we can always be imperfectly perfect in our own special way!

Thank you for reading dreamers,

Amber

 

Better Then Yesterday

img_8120Hey Beautiful Dreamers,

Today I was in my car and the song “So Yesterday” by Hilary Duff came on. I started singing on the top of my lungs. I don’t know about you, but I love when a song randomly comes on that I listened to as a kid. It’s almost like you are being time traveled back to that time in your life.

As the song continued to play I realized how it related to me differently as an adult. If you don’t know what the song is about it’s about a girl basically saying that she’s moving on from a guy, and that he’s ‘so yesterday.’ As a kid I used to sing it about my crush in school who didn’t pay any attention to me, but now as an adult I can relate it to guys that I’ve been in relationships with. When I thought about it deeper though I realized that the ‘so yesterday’ concept can be used about anything from my past.

The person who I was a decade ago, 2 years ago, 3 months ago, or even yesterday isn’t the same person I am today. If you knew who I was a few years ago you probably would be shocked about how much I’ve grown. I’m always finding new ways to self improve. It’s weird even today I learned more on how I can self improve in a way I had not expected. I’ve noticed lately I’ve been really hard on myself when it comes to my body image. I have certain goals that I want to reach and lately I’ve been talking to myself in a negative way when it comes to it. I’ve been going to the gym and eating healthier (which is great), but I also noticed I was putting so much pressure on myself to be perfect. The times when I didn’t eat the way I should or have the best workout ever I felt like a screw up. I kept telling myself that I will not look the way I want to if I keep messing up.

It then hit me today that, yes, I’m in no way being ‘perfect’, but I am doing healthier habits then what I was doing before. I realized if I can just do a little bit better each day then that is good enough. I always want to strive to improve, but also beating myself up because I’m not going a fast enough speed isn’t what I want to do either. I want to be able to make progress while still being able to be nice and loving towards myself.

I came to the realization that I needed to get out of this idea that I need to be this ‘perfect’ person’. No one is ever going to be that. The lesson I learned today is that what I needed to change more then me eating better or working out more is the way I talk to myself. The person who I was, putting myself down is now I’m deciding is becoming my ‘so yesterday’. The rest of today, and tomorrow I am going to strive to be a less judgmental towards myself.

I want to ask all of you reading this to figure out what your ‘so yesterday’ is. What can you learn to let go of from your ‘yesterday’ that can help you move on to help the future you? Each day I want to work towards an improved version of myself even if it’s not in the way I had expected. As long as we all keep growing a little everyday we are so much better than yesterday!

Thank you for reading dreamers,

Amber

What I’ve Learned About Motivation

 

Hey Beautiful Dreamers,

Have you ever struggled with finding motivation to do something? Do you keep putting things you want to accomplish off? If so this post is for you!

I know for myself, personally, I have struggled with this throughout my life. I’d have all these goals that I wanted to accomplish, but I kept putting them all off until I felt ‘ready.’ Then tomorrow would come, next week, next month, until years passed by and nothing had happened. That ‘ready’ moment never came and I didn’t understand why. Here is what I have learned about finding that motivation.

You Are Never Going to Find Motivation

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In my free time I like to watch inspiring YouTube videos. A few years ago while watching these kind of videos on YouTube I stumbled upon a Mel Robbins video. Mel said in that video an idea that I had never heard before, and that is ‘motivation is garbage.’ She had said something that was so simple, yet it hit me like a ton of bricks. I realized in that moment that I was never going to feel motivated to do something. It hit me that if I wanted something I had to stop making excuses and make myself do it.

Before that moment I had lived in this fantasy land that one day I was suddenly going to feel inspired to do something I wanted to do, but then years passed and nothing happened. I think many of us fall into that trap. We get into that rut of “I’ll do that tomorrow.” It’s not until you throw the excuses away and just do it that you are going to get anywhere. An example of this from my own life is my fitness journey. Throughout my life I’ve struggled with my weight either being too thin or overweight. It hasn’t been since these last few years that I’ve been able to get in more control of my weight. I struggled for the longest time living an active lifestyle; however, when I started pushing myself to start working out I was able to see progress I had never seen before in my life.

Now I go to gym regularly and working out has become a huge part of my life. Living an active lifestyle has become who I am, but I would have never gotten to that point if I had not pushed myself to do so first. There are still days I don’t feel like going to the gym, but I push myself to go do it anyway, because I know it will benefit me. I didn’t feel like going yesterday to be honest, but I made myself do it. I ended up having a great workout. I kept thinking to myself while at the gym that I could have missed out on a great workout if I had not pushed myself to go.

If you are reading this and struggle, like me, to find that ‘motivation’ I dare you to push yourself to do something you have been putting off to do. Yes, it’s hard to push yourself, but pushing yourself to do it is the hardest part. Once you push yourself and you do it I want you to see how it feels to accomplish it. I can almost guarantee that you are going to feel better about yourself. Also, once you do it you are going to start to realize you are in control of what you do in your life. That motivation isn’t what is going to drive you to do something. What you need to accomplish any goal you have already lives inside you. You got the power to do anything you want to do in this life.

Finding Your Why

img_2365Even though motivation is trash like Mel said I also think that it’s important to find your “why” for whatever you do. The “why” in your life is going to keep you going after you give yourself the push to do it. For example, I didn’t feel like writing this blog post at first. I then reminded myself  of why I want to write this blog. I reminded myself that I want to help people and by making myself write a post it could help at least one of you reading this right now. That made me want to do it.

If you look at any successful person in the world they all have a “why.” Inspirational people like Oprah, Steve Jobs, Gandhi, etc. all had a reason to why they were doing what they did. Even fictional characters like Superman have a “why”. If Superman didn’t have that drive to help others then he wouldn’t be going out to battle the bad guys. All of us need a reason to do something. Come up with your reason — maybe it’s to inspire others, maybe it’s for your kids, maybe you want to do it for yourself, your health, or your career. Whatever that reason is remember that when you go out to accomplish your goals.

Alright so that is all I have for today everyone. I hope you all have the most beautifully, wonderful day.

Thank you for reading dreamers,

Amber

 

Life Lessons I’ve Learned from Gaming

 

img_5620-1Hey Beautiful Dreamers,

Ever since I was a kid I loved to play video games. When I played a video game it felt like I was immersed inside of a movie or book, but unlike with a movie or a book I controlled more of what happened in the story. Video games quickly became an obsession for me. The obsession got so bad that I sometimes would even have dreams about playing the games. I in particular enjoyed playing games that featured a short, plump man named Mario.

Even though I loved video games, there was one aspect that I hated about them. The dreaded one thing I hated was when you would suddenly die on a high level with no lives left. That meant I had to start all the way from the beginning, and that I had to work hard to get to that point again. I would have to endure all the blood, sweat, and tears all over again (okay I’m exaggerating about the blood, but you get the point).

I still til this day hate dying in games and having to start over; however, I also see it now in a new light. I can look back over all of those ‘failures’ and see lessons that also apply to my actual life. One life lesson video games taught me was that if I won all the time without any issues there would be no challenge, and without the challenge it wouldn’t be as fun. I can honestly say that I wouldn’t feel near as accomplished after I won a game if it all had all come easy. I believe that this same thing can also be said about life. We go through trials all the time in life. If we didn’t have trials our lives would be very bland and boring. We all also wouldn’t feel as accomplished or successful if we all just had it handed to us. Our joy in life comes from working hard for what we want, and seeing our hard work pay off in the end.

Another lesson I’ve learned from dying all those times is that even though I had lost,  every time I started again was a new opportunity. It was a chance for me to start brand new. I think this can be said about our lives as well. We sometimes get so caught up in our losses that we don’t realize that these losses helped make us stronger. Every new day we live is an opportunity to take these ‘losses’ and apply them to make our lives even better.

If I didn’t fail all those times while gaming I wouldn’t have figured out the best way in order to win. It took those losses to learn what ‘not to do’ so eventually I could find what I ‘should do.’ We are going to mess up, or we are going to have events in our life that will try to bring us down. The important part of this is to not give up and know that these obstacles are going to get you a step closer to where you want to be in life. We may see these as ‘failures’, but what they really are is stepping stones to where we want to go. That being said I dare all of you reading this to go take those lessons you’ve learned and apply them to this new day/ opportunity!

Catch you later dreamers,

Amber

 

Welcome to My Blog DreamCatcher

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Hi Beautiful Dreamers,

My name is Amber and welcome to my blog DreamCatcher. I’m a writer who has always had a passion for helping others. I’m writing this blog in hopes that I can help inspire one of you reading this to go after your dreams, and to also give you advice about life that I’ve learned over the years. This blog is going to be filled with encouraging insights from my life, advice on topics I’ve collected over the years, and sharing tools such as books that have helped me throughout my life.

I want to be that voice in your head telling you that you can do anything you want to do in this life! You are a special gift to this world, and you are going to go out and catch your dreams. We are all given one life on this Earth and we can either sit back and wait for the perfect opportunity or we can decide that the moment is now to take that first step. I’m taking that first step now into making a dream of mine a reality by starting this blog, and I hope that you all can take this first step with me with your own dreams.

Thank you for reading dreamers,

Amber